Wednesday, 1 April 2009

Yet Another Fiction

"Sailing"
17th May 2008


They say that to unburden a heavy heart, let the ocean absorb all the crap. Since all drains lead to the ocean, might as well throw your own emotional waste into its depth.

He is walking along the shore, eyes looking at the horizon before him, admiring the sunset and the grandeur of the mauve sky above. Gust of wind pinches his sun-baked skin, feet wrapped and washed with sands. While remembering yesterday when everything was picture perfect and sweet tasting, it was pain that solely remained. All that is left are traces of what used to be a sand castle built to last a lifetime, a terminus for a happy ending. These memories, he tries to pull out from his head so as to discard an old habit that’s difficult to break.

Boys don’t cry. The culture dictates that it is weakness incarnate. So like what he always does, he kept it inside, deep down in his heart. It’s the routine he has mastered for a very long time. Or so he thought.

He was caught off guard when the dam burst. Now he’s drowning in his own tears, submerged in the water that tells a handful of stories, such stories that evolves and involves only him and the one he loves the most, with God as a witness.

All he want to do right now is to empty his lungs up to the last air. Then breathe deeply until his chest expands to its full capacity. And then in one shot, one blow, he’ll shout it all out into the big blue. Charged with all the crap he used to keep inside, he wants to belt it all out in full resonance and vibrato, to the highest note that his tensed cords can reach. Then finally, as the ocean answers his call he will surrender to the raging waves and let himself be conquered by this vast ocean of broken promises, to this cradle of life and death.

He was calling out your name, so as to let you know how much he loves you, but you cupped your ears with your bare hands. Your deep set eyes were closed to notice his existence and your shoulders remained cold. He’ll be gone forever that even if you beg to reclaim him from Triton’s bastion, he’ll never come back. Now it’s your turn to raise your voice and plead.


10 comments:

MkSurf8 said...

sometimes we underestimate ourselves but in truth, we're even larger than the ocean. don't give up. everyone deserves a second chance.

Jinjiruks said...

Ok lang iyon Eben, at least nasabi mo na ang dapat mong sabihin sa kanya. Kaya pala gusto mong mag hibernate dahil emotional outburst mode ka.

Turismoboi said...

i hate u na

nakakarelate ako!

the donG said...

it's just part of being human. we may not change them, but we can always be part of them.

Eben said...

@Mksurf8
I hope so..

@Jin
Sandaling hibernate mode lang naman.. saka anong emotional outburst? nakakain ba yun? LOL.

@CJ
really lah? why like that?

@the donG
the question is, do they even consider you as part of their life? :)

iriz said...

don't throw it to the ocean, chances are it will float again, shove back to the shore and touch your feet washed with sands. throw it straight to that person and let that person absorb all the crap to death. or we don't know that person might be dead right now with no chance to raise the voice and plead.

so how will i call this, a fictional comment?

great writing dear.

Reena said...

ang lalim naman nito.... i can't relate.

i always try to "un-complicate" my life, remove whatever is unnecessary to lighten up a burden i don't deserve.

life is defined by your choices, so in the end, it is still your choice.

Eben said...

@friendship
yes dear, its fiction loosely based on facts. LOL

pero friend ayoko naman ng revenge...hindi ako mapagtanim ng galit, you know that. :)


@Reena
I totally agree with what you said. Sino ba naman ang may gusto ng kumplikadong buhay di ba? :) Sabihin na lang natin na for the last time, ang gustong gawin nung "character" sa sinulat ko ay magtapon ng unnecessary baggage. He doesn't claim na wala siyang mistakes, in fact he's learning everyday dahil sa mga naging desisyon nya. And now almost ready na siya to move forward...ready for another adventure!

The "character" decided to close this chapter here...

iriz said...

ganun ba friend, e di kung ganun bakit hindi na lang yung person ang ihulog natin sa kailaliman ng dagat? wag nating tawaging revenge, katuwaan lang. LOL

Eben said...

@iriz
kaw talaga. LOL

hayaan na lang natin. tapos na yun. ;)